I wake up in the morning with a sadness in my heart, My soul still hurts, and I wish it was still dark; The depression follows me, always in my head, More than once, I've wished I were dead. The thought crosses my mind--day in, day out, My mind says 'just do it', while a part of me shouts "Don't be crazy, you survived so long, Bill would say, 'What you're thinking is wrong.'" I know what's wrong and I know what's right, I know I should go on, if just for spite; It's a lonely road that I've been chosen to follow, It can't be shared with anyone, I feel so hollow. I cry all alone, with just my thoughts, Is this why they died, why we fought; To grieve forever, as long as we live, Knowing we gave all, we have no more to give. But the thirst for life runs strong in my heart, I keep thinking that someday, I'll get a fresh start; To kill myself now would be so wrong, I survived the war, and the Cong. Now I have grandkids, two sons and a wife, I owe it to them to live this life; So survive I will, walking this lonely road, The pain in my head, such a heavy load. To be alone is sad, but not the saddest one can be, To be lonely is tragic, for no one can see The pain in your heart, your soul, your mind, You go on and on, living one day at a time. You know you shouldn't be here, your friends all dead, You should've died with them, but you're here instead; Your lonesomeness has become your friend, And will no doubt be with you, to the very end. So cry, my son, for the life you could have had, There's nothing you can do, it's just too Goddamn bad. Mike(pegleg)Dingwell

Copyright © 1996 By Michael Dingwell, All Rights Reserved